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Alice V. Graubart, LCSW
Licensed Conical Social Worker
1140 Lake Street, #504
Oak Park, Illinois 60301-1051
708-524-1474
An extended death is very difficult not only for the dying person, but also for family, friends, and other caretakers. In the prolonged process of dying, in each step along the way, every relationship becomes more complex, every action and every change requires many different kinds of resources. There is a sense of drama, but no denouement.
Instead, the dying process itself takes on the semblance of chronicity As a result, everyone experiences additional stress and anxiety, especially if it seems like there's "no end in sight." The feelings elicited in the terminally ill person, nuclear family, extended family, friends, and other caretakers become highly painful, ambivalent, conflict-laden, and requires many psychological "decisions." We will examine this aspect in detail in the session.
The extended death vigil also frequently requires the use of many community and medical resources. In this era of downsizing and managed care, each resource may be over-stretched for funds or staff, may not able to be flexible in their own use of resources, or sometimes perhaps are not attuned to the patient's or family's needs.
A lot of ethical decisions also generally need to be made during this prolonged period, many times with incomplete information, conflicting values, and intense personal and family dynamics.
These two issues play out against the above "backdrop," lending both a surreal and "normal" quality to the decisions, regardless of the actual consequences.
The presenter will speak from both her personal experience (her father died two years ago after a three year illness) and clinical experience (22 years as a therapist in practice, specializing in chronic medical illness).
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